I got an email from a childhood-JT friend in late May. I was so thrilled to get the email. I hadn't heard or talked to her since 1984.
In my book club we read a book on bullying and a girl that wanted to fit in recently. Please Stop Laughing at Me. I really could relate to the book in many ways. I moved a several times as a child and the high school moves where pretty hard. It was hard to fit in and hard to know who you can trust.
When it came time for college, I didn't' have residency anywhere. My folks were getting ready to move to South Dakota and I headed to Arizona where I lived as a young girl from 72-76. I had a friend, KS from when I was little that lived here and I came out in high school during the summer so it was somewhat home.
My childhood friend, KS and I went separate ways in college. Different choices, different directions. It really hurt me when we drifted apart. Besides my mom, dad, sister and some relatives... there is no one that knew me before college in my life. No one to reminisce with... no one who knew my secrets, passions, innocence, and much more.
I've talked about this before with my friends I have now. Which by the way ... I love you all. I just want some history with you as well. We are making some good history aren't we?
When I quit teaching after Kate and Claire were born, I was depressed many times. I had all my "friends" from teaching but the mommy thing and no one to hang or call was hard. They all were working and in a different place. I did make friends gradually but it was hard. I'm so quick to love that I made some errors along the way-- not being a good friend and/ or not choosing a good friend.
I really feel that I am settling back into the friendship thing again. This probably sounds funny to some of you seeing how outgoing and how I love people and all but it's hard to be outgoing and feel "safe and trusting" at the same time.
When I heard from JT, I was thrilled someone who knew me during Junior High and the first year or so of High School. Such lovely awkward times that is. We had fun together. She lived about 4 houses down and we loved to talk, play cards, ride bikes, and be kids together. The best part of hearing from her was that she was now in Tucson. I invited her to come spend Christmas with my family. Of course I gave her the disclaimer she'd be much loved but no privacy.
The anticipation was so full of joyous memories. We talked a little on Sunday and wondered how our friendship ended, sad, bad or what... Neither one of us could specifically remember. I know I moved but why didn't we keep in touc? I just knew I was so happy and couldn't wait to see her.
Christmas Day about 1p.m. I looked out the window and up the driveway she was coming. Words can't describe the instant feeling of my heart melting with joy over my friend. We talked, laughed, the kids smothered her. My parents and sister welcomed her like no time has passed.
We had a girls night and watched Mama Mia and sang along, stayed up late and shared stories. She is a Captain in the Air National Guard and has some interesting stories. She actually served at Luke Air Fore base some of the same years with my husband in the same unit but different department (sorry all you military people for probably insulting you with civilian jargon describing this).
She left this morning to go back home but I know I'll see her again. I love her and am thrilled to rekindle what hopes to be an adult friendship as well.
Thank you JT for the wonderful trip down memory lane. Can't wait to see you or hear from you again. You are always welcomed in my home.
Meags
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5 comments:
What a beautiful story! You had me thinking back as I was reading ...I don't have any friends in my life that knew me when I was younger.... I grew up in Ohio and my two friends are gone. As for high school out here, my ex-husband was my high school sweetheart and even though I remember who my friends were during those years, I don't have any contact with them... and my best friend in college is back east and, literally, sends me a photo of her kids each Christmas, but not even three words to go with it! All of my friends, including you, are people whom I have met over the last 20 years. It's as if those doors of the past have permanently shut. But look at you!! One of those doors has opened back up again....I think this is an incredible story and what a beautiful Christmas present to have! I am so glad that your reunion with your friend was full of laughs and joy! It sounds like it was a lot of fun...what a wonderful story, dear Meagen. By the way.... I am grateful to call you my friend....let's not let the door shut. : )
xox
Carol
Hey, Meagan! I'm feeling back to normal again and am finally taking the time to read my friend's blogs instead of just my own! This is a great story!
I, too, hadn't kept in touch with any friends from high school. I've told you I started a new school my senior year and that being in the band was the highlight of that year. If it wasn't for band and my sister, I don't think I would have had any friends. After I went off to nursing school I didn't keep in touch with anyone from high school. Well, when we found out I had this cancer, my sister-in-law emailed one of my old friends from band in high school and he emailed two two other friends and they've been sending pictures and writing to me of memories they have of being in band together. It's been wonderful! I hope at some point to be able to go back east and see them in person. Wonderful things are happening because of this terrible disease!
I hope you consider me one of your new friends. I'm not very good at reaching out and calling up people to do things, but I treasure my time with all my book club buddies and really enjoyed just talking with you on the way home last time.
Hope you enjoy the rest of your break!
Love,
Martha
I am so glad you reconnected after all of these years. It is hard for me to imagine what it would be like to move a lot as a child. Growing up in a small town, I knew so many people and have contact with many people I knew when I was young and that was a long time ago!! I see the difference when you grow up in a larger town like my kids did. It's not the same as a small town and all of the connections that you make from a small town.
Say hi to all of the kids for me!!
First off, thank you sweetie for adding my blog to yours....how I so love you!...as my sister said to you at Kelly's Christmas book club party, whenever you are seen, you bring to each of us such smiles and joy!....everything that you are shines through that beautiful face of yours!
I, like Cheela, have very different memories of high school, than of you, Carol, and Martha....I believed I was "seemingly" very happy then....I still can speak of those times with joy in my voice.....
A group of 8 to 10 of us ran around everyday and weekend....we partied way too much, never were we considered a specific click unto ourselves but, could hang out with just about everyone, and but of course studies were not ever the focus....I remember truly believing that we were all best friends.....with age and some wisdom behind me now, those of my teens years so fell short :(...I do not want to blame it on immaturity or such....I can vividly recall many unkindness's and unresolved issues....to me these were far above the normal teenage squabbles.....stealing boyfriends etc....still, I e-mail with most of them monthly....Christmas cards are exchanged......we at times, have spoken of the misunderstandings and non-accepted apologies.....we have chosen to laugh about them....but, at times I do find hurt still resides in my heart.....this July is my 30th reunion back in CT....I am anxious to be attending...I just don't know if I'm going to go with the same reasons I did for my 20th....I should let it go and just laugh right?
In closing I do want you to know, how much I love all of you precious women that I have come to know through Carol now!.....each of you bring me true love, acceptance, validation and friendship....we exist in the moments of us....thank you thank you from a girl that is obviously still learning some important lessons in life....
N-Peace
Hi Meags - I'm enjoying reading through the posts of your blog. There is nothing like great memories and old friends. I think Cheela and I are fortunate in that we lived all of our early years in a small town, so consequently, we are probably in touch with a lot more people from way back when than most people. Thanks for stopping by my blog and commenting - hopefully one day, we will meet! Best wishes.
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